We’ve all enjoyed cross-marketing campaigns over the years. Who doesn’t think back fondly on the mashup of Mountain Dew, Doritos and Call of Duty (er, Titanfall 2 this year apparently)? Nothing makes you thirstier than the visage of one of Battlefield 1's World War I soldiers emblazoned upon the side of a tall-boy of Monster Energy Drink, right? But these American cross-marketing promotions are amateur hour compared to what we get in Japan.

Case-in-point:

(Full disclosure: I’m chewing some right now.)

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But when a truly huge Japanese video game is about to be released, that’s when the gates of marketing hell (conveniently located at the bottom of the Mariana Trench) are opened to allow a kaiju-infused nighmare of cross-marketing campaigns to unfurl upon the Land of the Rising Sun.

I give you... CUP NOODLE XV.

This is possibly the greatest thing to have ever happened in the history of the world.

Just look at the majesty of it all:

I will not rest until late-night hunger is banished from our world and Cup Noodle is restored!
For fuck’s sake, Gladio.
Ever find some weird shit in your Cup Noodle? Me too, man. Me too.
Protect the flavor!
Never speak to me or my son again.
Jesus.

Words do not do the awkwardness of this campaign justice. Yes, Cup Noodle is advertised in the game world of Final Fantasy XV. Yes, your characters can literally eat Cup Noodle in-game. Yes, there is a quest in the game where Gladio expounds quite elaborately on how much he loves Nissin Cup Noodle.

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Now, to be fair, the in-game Cup Noodle looks about a billion times tastier than an actual Cup Noodle:

WTF I’ll eat that.

I mean, seriously... is that roast beef slices on top? And a sprig of parsley? Who does that? No wonder it’s so popular in Ivalice or wherever the hell Final Fantasy XV takes place!

One thing is certain: Our lives are better because this cross-marketing campaign exists. Also one other thing: I’m not going to eat any more Cup Noodle because of this cross-marketing campaign.


Thank you for reading TAY. I am M.J. Yamaguchi, PhD. You can always find me on Twitter, my handle is @mjyams.