I'm really feeling it!
I'm really feeling it!
This is a platform for User Generated Content. G/O Media assumes no liability for content posted by Kinja users to this platform.

I'm Knee-Deep in Multiple 100+ Hour RPGs and Oh God What Have I Done

Me, trying to remember what in the world I’m doing in any given video game
Me, trying to remember what in the world I’m doing in any given video game
Screenshot: from my last (recent!) playthrough

Alright so- I’ve infiltrated the palace, and Futaba is basically giving me free reign to steal her heart- all that’s left to do is challenge the sphinx and survive the fight! Seems like that might be difficult though, so I guess I’ll blow off some steam somewhere else.

Advertisement

Hm. Ok. I’m 35 floors up in Tartarus, but it doesn’t feel like things are getting any more difficult; did I clear this and not realize it? Why am I here again? I’ll come back to you.

Huh. Seems like Yosuke is mad about... something? Teddy needs me to talk to who now? At least it’s New Game Plus but I’m still not sure what that applies to. Moving on.

Advertisement

Uh-oh. Blitzball. I don’t remember literally anything about this but the name. Yikes.

Ah, Roach. You’ll never leave my side. Wait, what do you mean I can’t pick up this herb? “Inventory full”- that can’t be true- well what do you know. Looks like I’ve picked up about 30 bandit swords. I guess I should... sell these? Was I collecting these for a reason? Wait, what continent am I on?

Advertisement

I’m starting to feel like everyone calling me “Commander” is only doing it out of a sense of obligation because I sure as hell don’t feel like one. Would a good commander completely forget the names of everyone in their firesquad? Or what their skills actually do? Did I really just put the wrong sniper on the roof and- well, there goes another rookie. Sorry, bud. Your name will live on in the bar. I’ll stop by if I remember *salutes*.

So I know it seems like I’m making strategically bad decisions but I promise I’m just trying to remember how to actually play this game. Varl are big but slow, centaurs are strong and fast... Wait, what the hell is “break damage” again? Sure looks like the world is ending, someone ought to do something about that. Oh, am I supposed to be doing something about that?

Advertisement

Looks like I managed to point the four giant lasers towards the void in the center of the map... but I certainly don’t feel like I’m strong enough to do anything about that. Is there someone who can tell if I’m strong enough to do something about that? Or maybe I should just chop down this forest and collect wood, beetles, and mushrooms. Yeah, that seems like a better idea.

Wait, when the hell did I download Suikoden? When the hell did I download Suikoden II? At least here I can confidently say I have no idea what’s going so a restart it is!

Advertisement

Damn this battle system is satisfying. And these outfits are so cute! But how on earth do I master skills? I guess I’ll just grind because that’s the one thing I know how to do, I’m sure Ringabel won’t mind too much. Or will he? Is he the sassy one? Wait, did I betray this character or did they betray me? “Sin”- is that a metaphor? Or, wait, no, it’s literal? Seems like we’re in the apocalypse now, but over there it already happened, and so one sense I’m trying to prevent the end of the world from happening but in another sense why fight it since Hyrule went through it already?

At the very least, I really should head to bed early. I have an early class, and I can’t remember which one I’m allowed to slack off in.

Share This Story

Get our newsletter