I'm really feeling it!
I'm really feeling it!

Universal Soldier is a Turrican game reskinned to look like a Jean-Claude van Damme movie. For those of you that joined my stream, I apologize for the multiple delays and the demonic voiceover; I wasn't told until after I cut the stream that my microphone was 2 spoopy 4 TAY. I'll work on getting that and other technical problems ironed out, but I hope to be streaming again by the end of the week.


Anyway, as for the game... It's okay. But I have zero incentive to beat it. It has some cool things going for it, but it's hampered by some really bad design decisions that really cripple the game for me.

- Jean-Claude van Damme can turn into a spiky morphball. And he lays morphball bombs. Also, note the image above. These bizarre graphics choices created during a ramshackle conversion into a licensed game are just surreal - and fun to laugh at.
- The weapons are pretty fun to use, especially the aforementioned morphball.


- You have no recovery time. If an enemy decides to stand within your hitbox, your health will drain from 100% to zero in 2-3 seconds. It's quite broken.
- The levels are confusing. I could not advance past the second level, because it's a bloody maze. You wind up on some platforms up in the air, but there's no way of telling where the next platform is. If you miss your leap of faith, you're back at the start of the level. This got old very fast.
- Graphics are ugly, even for the Genesis. But this is more because of artistic choices than the technology.
- There's something screwy with the jump controls. A LOT of Genesis games have this issue, but sometimes when you hit the jump button, there's a short delay between the button press and the actually jump, making for some frustrating platforming. Chakan has the same problem, but at least Chakan is fun.
- Because of the constant backtracking and shitty health system, this game would be a fucking nightmare without an infinite lives cheat.

So yeah. I think this one's getting sold. My next game will be either Gargoyles or Batman & Robin. Any preference between those two, TAY?

Share This Story

Get our newsletter