As you can see here, this appears to be concept art for a female Link. I think it would be silly to assume this is concept art for a costume in Bayonetta, so I would not make that assumption. This is clearly art for Zelda Wii U 2016 HYYYYYYYYPE. lET ME EXPLAIN WHY IT;’S PRMOMBLEMATIC

Basically, Link should not be a girl. Ever. As we all know, video games are made for men with penises, and any other type of person should be excluded from gaming at all costs. Well, maybe not all gaming. Girls can play The Sims or Flappy Bird between doing their hair and making babies, if their dads and husbands say it’s okay.

Basically, Link is the embodiment of all things GUY. He has an effeminate haircut, wears a tight-fitting tunic, and yelps in a boyish voice whenever he swings his sword or gets hit. Clearly, Link is designed to be the sort of rough-and-tumble boys boy that talks about sports and breasts and VAPING. I bet he drives an F-150.

These social justice warriors (they’re basically Nazis, you guys, they want to be treated equally or some shit) on Twitter and MySpace and whatever, they want to take Link away from you. They actually want to oppress men so badly that they will give players the option to play as whoever they feel best matches them as an avatar. Crazy, right? They might as well start burning books and lining us BROFUL GUYMEN up for the firing squad!

I just hope that when they bring this over, it remains true to the JAPANESE GLORIOUS NIPPON, PINNACLE OF PERFECTION version. Hell, it shouldn’t even be translated! Why sully the perfection of Japanese language and culture by putting inferior American words on it? Keep it Japanese. If these idiot Americans can’t read Japanese, frankly, they need to watch more anime and git gud. Honestly, I don’t understand why Americans get so offended over sexualized 13 year olds in lingerie. Like, if that’s okay in Japan, clearly, it should be okay everywhere. All other cultural standards should KNEEL when faced with glorious Nippon Japanese superior culture.

Advertisement

And honestly, we should use violence to threaten creative types making decisions we don’t like. Art should never make us emotional, or challenge us to think, or any of that fluffy liberal shit. Art should be something that agrees with my existing views at all times, and something that makes me feel comfortable in my bubble. Gaming is my safe space, and other people should not be allowed to have what I have. Remember, if someone localizing a game does anything other than shove Japanese text into Google Translate, they should be doxxed and threatened on social media. Be sure to mention how much less you pay in rent because you live with your parents and have no job prospects.

Anyway. Thought I’d share my unbiased opinion. Thanks!

[THIS WAS ALL SARCASM. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, KEEP IN MIND THAT THIS IS ALL SARCASM. PEOPLE ACTUALLY THINK THIS WAY, AND THEY ARE FUCKING HILARIOUS, BUT I AM MOCKING THEM, NOT AGREEING WITH THEM. PLEASE LAUGH AT THEM WITH ME.]