I'm really feeling it!
I'm really feeling it!
Illustration for article titled Girl Friend No Longer Playing Pokémon Go

TUSTIN – Stating a gradual loss of interest compounded by unfamiliarity with Generation II, local man Benito Morales was informed today by friend Maritza Venegas that she would no longer be playing Pokémon Go.


Sources report that Venegas’ unilateral decision to quit the game brings an end to the pair’s exclusive outings that saw them on long walks, hikes, and drives together starting last summer, serendipitously beginning at the expansive retail warehouse where they work and met while hunting for pokémon.

“Why don’t you just try it out for a couple days? I think you’ll love it,” urged Morales. “There are a ton of new pokémon, and most of them are really cool – even better than the originals.”


“I stopped watching Pokémon after the first season, Benny. I don’t feel like learning a bunch of new ones,” said Venegas who, underneath the facial piercings, heavy eyeliner, and biting sarcasm, Morales told family members was a sweet girl with a soft heart from a small town in the valley.

“They aren’t all totally new,” he countered. “Some of them are like baby versions of the original pokémon. Like there’s one called Pichu that’s an even smaller, cuter version of Pikachu.”


“Wow, how creative...” she said back at him. “Listen, it was fun in the beginning, but it’s been, what, six months? It’s just more of the same now. It’s boring.”

“They keep adding new features though,” he told her, aware of sounding desperate as he remembered the long, laughing embrace Venegas gave him when he caught her that Snorlax she was too afraid to lose and which she named “Beeto” in his honor.


“If you say so,” she answered dismissively.

“Well, are you playing any new games?”

“Not currently.”


“Hey, I gotta go catch up with some people. See you around, okay?”

“Work people?” he asked, already feeling her slip away.

People, Benito. Just people.”

@TheMushroomNews + themushroomnews@gmail

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