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I Am No Longer A Nerd. This Is My New Life.

Well, internet, it’s been fun, but I have lost my source of nerdness, and am therefore no longer a nerd. Let me explain.

So, a while back, my roof started leaking. Luckily, it was just over carpet, so my video games weren’t getting soaked and I wasn’t undergoing Chinese water torture, but, you know, roof’s still leaking. So we call some guys, they do stuff, and it still leaks. So we call other guys and they do more stuff. This stuff involves taking everything out of my room, except my bed.



And with that, my nerd center has collapsed. As I type, I feel my love for Doctor Who and The Legend of Zelda collapsing. My full Super Smash Bros. amiibo collection, all of my posters, everything, is gone. I mean, it’s a few feet away in the next room, and it’ll be moved back tomorrow, but it’s the internet, dammit! IT’S GONE FOREVER!!!

Goodbye nerd room!

So, I guess I’ll start my new life as a non-nerd today. I’ll do normal-people stuff, like watch football and... damn, what do normal people do? Netflix? Yeah, I guess they watch Netflix. So I’ve been meaning to watch Sword Art Online- dammit! Breaking Bad. That’s a good show, right? Cool. I’ll watch that.


But what about Star Wars? That’s a normal-people thing, because everyone likes Star Wars, but it’s also a nerd thing? I guess I’ll just take a normal person approach to Star Wars. Watch the movies, and then forget about it until the next one. Oh wait. I already do that. Welp, I’ve got that covered!

But what about video games? They’re becoming more mainstream, but not the ones I play. I guess I can keep playing video games, but I’ll play the normal ones, like Call of Duty and Sports. The game. That’s probably a thing.


Oh, gosh darn it! I can’t do this! “Normal” behavior by a group that is becoming progressively less “mainstream” is just making sure you don’t “specialize” in any interest. Even mainstream things, like sports! So you watch a few games, especially those of your favorite team. Normal. But if you watch every game you can, record them on DVR, listen to sportscasts, have a tattoo of your favorite team’s logo, and have framed signed autographs of your favorite players on your wall, you’re a nerd! And that is so okay! There’s a line for everything, of course, and you should know where that line is and stay far away from it. But from the people I know that aren’t nerds and those who are, I’d much rather hang out with a nerd, even if we have completely different subjects of our nerdiness. My girlfriend is a total nerd for birdwatching, and a bunch of my friends are theater nerds, myself somewhat included. Nerds often have a rare source of passion that a lot of other people lack. Being in the middle of my room, surrounded by a white canvas of nothing, isn’t what I want. In that way, my full Smash Bros. amiibo set and huge poster collection aren’t the things that I’m proud of; it’s the passion that drove me to collect those things in the first place.

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