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Static: I'm Broke *Bleep* I'm Broke!

Illustration for article titled Static: Im Broke *Bleep* Im Broke!

...ekt Red… CD Projekt Red… CD Projekt Red. I wonder how everyone pronounces the name. I should probably ask my polish friend to be sure. I’m sure Americans say “Cee Dee” but I say “Cay Day”.


A lot of people got riled up when they heard that Cyberpunk 2077 was gonna be a first person RPG. All I could think was: “Wow, I can’t wait to see how CD Projekt Red are gonna pull this off.” Let’s face it, they’ve earned at least a modicum of trust at this point. So far, every outlet or YouTuber who saw that demo, that I saw, came out like: “This is Heaven in the form of a video game.” I think we can chill.

What’s keeping me from writing a real article this time? Would you believe it to be another BBQ? This one really snuck up on me too. It was a spontaneous family BBQ. I’m not a big fan of surprises to be honest. But I can adapt. So again, in less than a week, it’s time to bust out the ol’ static.


Anthem executive producer Mark Darrah said that Anthem didn’t meet expectations because of Zelda: Breath of the Wild. This isn’t something I say often in writing. But get the fuck outa here. You don’t have to be a company-man to the bitter end. Just be like: “It’s a shame, it is what it is, and we’ve learned valuable lessons from it.”

The annual, gimme your goddamn money- I mean, the steam summer sale started and I am broke as fuck. This might be the first year that I don’t buy anything at all. The steam link is going for 95% off, they are practically giving these things away. I bought one for my brother a year back, since his living situation had him set up his PC far away from his living room. He has an Xbox one but never uses it. The steam link is all he uses for gaming. The Xbox he uses for Netflix and YouTube. If only the steam link could do that, than it’s bye bye useless Xbox.


You’re telling me Sony rented out two venues for E3 and one was exclusively for The Last of Us 2? Good to see that they got so much faith in the franchise, but we had to wait for people to relocate to the other venue. You gotta keep the momentum going, Sony. I was gonna play The Last of Us on PS3, and was gonna buy it just before I caught wind of an enhanced version on PS4. And then found out that it’s even prettier on a PS4 Pro. Now I can barely even afford the PS3 copy. I’m wondering if I should just play it there and get it over with.

I called it kind of! Two years ago I speculated that the next Elder Scrolls is gonna be in High Rock. Why? Perfect excuse for adapting the settlement system from Fallout 4 into Elder scrolls. “Find a Hill and become a King” or something like that. Okay maybe we don’t know for sure that it’s gonna be High Rock, but just look at those hills and mountains! Rocks on high plateaus! CEO 2018... CEO 2018… CE...

Papito Qinn is into the whole YouTube thing, is the winner of the 2016 SpookTAYcular Scary Story Contest, and atwitter incompetent. “I think he just had too much to drink.”

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