I'm really feeling it!
I'm really feeling it!
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The TAY Advent Calendar: Day 8

Illustration for article titled The TAY Advent Calendar: Day 8

Game: Dog Off!

Time to Play: 5 minutes

I’m going to use this opportunity to tell a story about myself.

I used to work at Disneyland Paris. I was a character performer, so I dressed up as various different Disney characters, and wandered around the park taking pictures with people.


I loved it. One of my favourite jobs of all time.

On a break I had with a few of my colleagues, we looked to check out the American-style Diner they had on the park premises. It was all showy; 50’s music, waitresses on roller-skates, the whole shebang.


And on the menu, was a food challenge.

It was a monster, too. A octo-burger. 8 quarter pounders, stacked on top of each other, with cheese in between each of them. There was lettuce, bacon, cheese, onions, and all the other trimmings as well.


I was feeling particularly hungry that day, so I went for it.

In fact, I wasn’t that hungry. I just wanted to show off. I was sitting across the table from genuine Disney Princesses, and for some reason attempting this challenge made me feel macho.


What a silly boy I was.

So I ordered it, with as much bravado as I could muster. A side of fries and a large Milkshake too.


And then one of the dancers next to me, a real skinny guy called Dane, piped up too:

“Yeah, I’ll try that as well.”


Context: I was probably twice the weight of Dane. He was a solid 5 inches smaller than me too. And he was ordering the same burger that I was? I was amazed. And shocked. He had no chance.


They brought the burgers out – to a fanfare too – and we saw the challenge ahead of us. They were massive. Larger than either of us ever expected. But hey, let’s see how we could do.

My strategy was to take each burger at a time. 1, all the way through to 8.

Burger 1: No problem. Easy. Washed it down with my Strawberry milkshake too.

Burger 2: Oh, I actually already feel full. That’s not good.

Burger 3: Man, these burgers are dense. What on earth have I signed myself up for.


Burger 4: Sweating.

Burger 5: Absolutely forcing it down my throat. I reckon I might be able to do it however.


Burger 6: Change my mind: there is no way in hell I can do it.

Burger 7: I’m slow. One small bite at a time. The struggle is real.

At this point the rest of the table pointed out that I hadn’t even touched my fries yet. My heart sank as low as my overfull stomach would let it.


Burger 8: Last one. I reached the finish line. The challenge was only the burger, not the fries, so my pride only took a short beating.

And then Dane piped up.

“Mind if I have your fries?”

I looked across, awestruck. He had demolished his entire burger. And unlike me, he looked positively chipper about it.


I ended up giving him my fries, and he ate them all by himself too. To this day, I still have no idea how he did it.

God bless you Dane, you food-demolishing beast, you.

What does that have to do with today’s game? Not much, but it’s a game about an eating competition.


It’s kind of relevant.



- This game plays much like an old-school mini-game. What’s your favourite mini-game, inside a game?


- What was your high score? (I managed 33!)

- What’s the most you’ve ever eaten in one sitting?

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