(There are spoilers below the cut for Dragon Age II) In many games with a complex story, we have moral choices. How do we handle our power? Whose interests do we privilege? Is attaining money or power worth interpersonal sacrifices? But then there are those choices in games where we choose if we want to be a total jerk.

In Dragon Age II, we are introduced to Fenris, our tragic elf boyfriend who hated blood mages just like we did. (Ok, maybe just me, but the Templars and the Circle are really dealing with a real social problems. If mages had better self control, the Templars wouldn’t need to crack down. They are just doing their job. And look at Anders. ANDERS. I could just tell that he was trouble by how sweaty he seemed).

Anyway, Fenris had been enslaved by a Tevinter assholes. Tevinter is a city that seems like it is ruled by Caligula, where it is all about power through any means necessary and it is just riddled with corruption. It is the epicenter of dickery in this world. If Dick Cheney was in Thedas, he’d live in Tevinter. So would Justin Bieber. Now triangulate that in your head and you get a good idea of how bad Tevinter really is. They enslave elves and humans and probably just about anyone else that they can control. They are bad, to be sure, but not a kind of majestic evil. They just seem like dicks.

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Fenris was given painful lyrium markings all over his body by Danarius, the Magister , giving him power and enormous pain, which fits in with his depressed emo elf persona. He’s bitter and pissed off and on the run. He had run away from his magister and been healed by the Qunari fog warriors and then when his magister caught up to him, he ordered Fenris to kill them. And Fenris did. THE GUILT. He ran. THE BITTERNESS. Now he is fighting with Hawke (i.e you). THE POSSIBILITY OF REDEMPTION.

Anyway, at some point, Fenris’s sister stops by to see him and of course it’s a trap. Well, Hawke,you have a choice. You meet up with his magister who has come to fetch him. You could do the right and normal and the only vaguely correct thing and fight and save him or help him kill Danarius or you could do the biggest dick move in all of gaming. You know what I am talking about—you would just be like “Sure, Danarius. I like betraying my greatest and most tragic ally for no real reason and in a way that is completely inconsistent with my moral code.” And you do it for a few gold but mostly for the satisfaction of seeing the tragic elf totally broken. God, just seeing Danarius makes me want to punch the screen.

I mean, I played this out just to see what would happen but i felt so dirty. SO DIRTY. I couldn’t live with myself. He looks so sad and tragic and defeated and I just wanted to run after him and apologize but I couldn’t because it was a game with a predetermined script. ACH. Never again. Such an ultimate dick move. Such a dick move. No wonder he’s bitter. But if you want to be a dick, this could be a game strategy. But he looks so sad and surprised and sad and disappointed. He needs you. And you let him down. God, don’t do this.

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But Anders likes you more. That’s quite an endorsement. (that’s sarcasm. Anders is the WORST. The absolute worst. That’s what blood magic does)

Ok, I showed you mine, You tell me yours. Oh and check out Corgis’s play- through of Dragon Age Inquisition. It’s the BEST.